I’m not sure how I came to find the article Nurse reveals the top 5 regrets people make on their deathbed by Sina Anvari featured at Karenstan – Stunning Quotes and Photos from around the world. But the link has been sitting in my drafts file for a while. With a Christmas week behind that I would include in my all time Top 5 if not my bestest (I like that word, even if it is a made up word) of all, I figured today would be a good day to attack my thoughts on this subject head on. When I first read the article, I was struck with the feeling that these are the type of things I wanted to convey and share with my website, even if I did not know it beforehand.
Life is an adventure to be lived, enjoyed and shared.
As you can guess by the article title, Sina’s article is about the top things people on their deathbed wish they had done differently. I strongly suggest you hit the link and read the article, as what I am going to attempt here is to address each of the five items and offer Augie’s Adventures take on not having any regrets. (well, it is worth a try isn’t it)
Making Life Choices to Avoid the Regrets
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
Boy that is a tough one, we’re not starting off on an easy one that’s for sure. Over the last 2 years, this has been the subject of many discussions between me and my family, friends and therapists. Interesting enough, being true to myself has resulted in taking less hunting and fishing trips and expanding my efforts and time into areas I had always thought about but was a little apprehensive about trying. As for many years I thought I was supposed to be the hunting and fishing guy for everyone.
The number one response to my moving to Alaska for the summer by those closest to me was “yep, that makes sense, it is who you are.” They saw the real true me, even if I did not.
Sitting in a room one day with a friend, I explained how I was having this thought of going away and staying in a hotel for a week to finish writing a book. I wanted to write in the mornings and deer hunt in the afternoons. I was embarrassed about having such crazy thoughts. The reply I got opened up the world to me. She said, “That makes perfect sense, that is what writers and people like you do. That is your normal.”
I learned two important things that afternoon. I am not alone in how I feel and see the world, and it is important to surround yourself with people that understand you for who you are and not question why you are the way you are.
2. I wish I didn’t work so hard
I think I may have that one down, as I have been known to use my vacation time liberally. But the truth may lie with the fact that it is not so much about the hours we spend on the time clock for the sake of a paycheck verses doing those things we love. While the time I spend writing or photographing may be considered work for some, it is a total enjoyment, and I often lose all track of time when behind the keyboard or wandering around looking for the next photograph. Not so much for the regular job. I believe “Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.” – Confucius, should be posted at the entrance of every high school and college.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
A real man does not cry. Can I just say BS to that one. Last Sunday when my two daughters joined me in church for the first time in a long time and as I held my arm around my mother, missing my father, a tear or two ran down my cheek. As I have said earlier, the last two years has been a huge time of learning for me, and the greatest thing I have learned is to let my feelings surface. I still find it hard at times to fully allow the smile or laughter freely flow or to let the tears fall, but when I do,the sensation is so much better than leaving them bottled up inside.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
I suck at this one. And to those friends that are reading this blog, I apologize. This is what I want to improve with in the coming year. I guess you could call that a New Year’s resolution.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier
I’ve heard it said that we are our own worst enemy. We strive for perfection when we are imperfect people. We wear the cloths to impress others instead of what we like and makes us happy. One of my favorite quotes is “Let people feel the weight of who you are and let them deal with it.” Wild at Heart, John Eldridge. With this blog I do it because it makes me happy. I enjoy it. When I begin to worry about the lack of traffic or hits on the shared links, or the need to post more often, I have to remind myself this is supposed to be a fun outlet for me and I try to refocus.
The new year is about to begin. A time when we remember the year gone and dream of the year to come. I believe, we all could use some time to reflect on those thoughts above and maybe if we all strived to be better persons to ourselves we would be and could be better friends, coworkers, and just all around better, happier society in general. Not perfect, but maybe a little more content in ourselves and those around us.
